The reason so many people never totally fulfill their potential is not because they lack the skills, but mostly because they lack the belief in themselves. With self-confidence, you can do anything!
Often confidence is viewed as something that only the few lucky ones have, but that is not true, as confidence is not innate, it stems from the thoughts we think and the actions we take as a result. It is your belief in your ability to succeed and not your actual potential to succeed.
Of course we know that the beliefs we hold as true do have a direct effect on the things we do and the way we decide to live our lives. Research into neural plasticity has shown that we have the ability to rewire our brains, which in turn can affect our thoughts and behavior.
Which means that no matter how shy you are or how many doubts you have, you can build self-confidence “by choice”. Of course confidence can grow or reduce during the course of our lives. It is growing for example when we succeed or receive praise and, on the contrary, reduces when we experience failures or setbacks, or if we’re criticized or rejected. However, we shouldn’t rely so much on praise to boost our self-worth.
Here are five tips, all backed by science, to help you boost your self-confidence :
Acting As If…
The most powerful way to build esteem is to act as if you had this strong self-confidence. Speak louder.
Exit your comfort zone !
Alex Malley, which is the author of The Naked CEO said that “The only way to build self-confidence is to take a risk and take action despite your fear of failure, messing up or embarrassment. If things work out as expected, then you know you can do more than you think you were capable of doing. If things don’t work out, you now know that you can handle more than you think you were capable of handling. Either way, you’re better of.
This so true. People often don’t achieve the career they dream of because they are so afraid to do anything that might put this same career at risk. So they will stay in their comfort zone where there is almost no risk of failing and no threats to their confidence. But the thing is when we stay in our comfort zone we stop learning and when we stop learning, we stop growing.
The unwillingness of people to loose things and be in a less secure position is making them miss out on bigger opportunities, opportunities which would have in the first place, helped them learn and strengthen their confidence along the way.
Work on your body posture.
If you try to stand up tall and have your shoulders back, and smile with confidence, this will move your body into the posture of someone who is highly self-confident. When you do this, the shift in your physical state will allow a shift in your mental and emotional state. Harvard Professor Amy Cuddy has shown, that if you put yourself in a “Power Pose”, it will really change your physiology, releasing a strong dose of testosterone to fuel your confidence.
Copy your mentors.
Everybody has someone they admires who radiates self confidence. Trying standing in their shoes and copying their way of standing and the things they would say if they were facing your challenges right now.It will greatly help you see things differently.
Focus on your own goals.
The more you put attention on something, the bigger it becomes. If you choose to put your focus on things that make you stressed out, you’ll soon become more anxious. So focus on the contrary on things that inspire you, and you’ll quickly feel better and more self-assured. So instead of being fearful on the bad things that could happen, focus on what you want and dream of.
Visualization.
Visualization is a great tool for building self-confidence. It does activate the same neural circuitry in the brain as when you do the same thing in reality. It was shown that athletes that mentally rehearsed that they were jogging, happened to have the same physiological changes as if they did in reality jog! Crazy, isn’t it. So if you act “as if”, it will truly make a difference. Try to imagine yourself doing whatever it is you want to do with the strong belief in your ability to do it well.
